When I go out with all of the Wee Ladies I become a whole other creature. I become part animal and part machine. As soon as I put the car in reverse to leave the driveway it's like the third eye in the back of my head opens from its nap. Along with the additional eye, my neck lengthens because that is my radar tower. My hearing sharpens. My protective animal instincts to keep my young safe and by my side kicks in. Minimizing is key. I do not take anything extra with me. I have The Destroyer on my hip, I pull Spark Plug by her forearm and EvieG runs around us in circles. Hence the third eye.

My monitoring radar system is on as we drive. I listen and can deal with just about everything from the driver's seat without having to pull over. "I heard that! Keep your hands to yourself!" I say when I hear the faintest of subtle slaps. Cough, cough and I respond with, "Are you ok? Can you breathe?" thinking that one of them may be choking on their Arrowroot. I can listen to music (or CBC when it's my turn) and hear all that is happening behind me all at the same time.

At the store, my neck lengthens a little bit more and my ears turn out. My third eye is constantly scanning. I try to keep them all together as best I can, but it doesn't always work. Quick little creatures that they are, they can sometimes get away from you. They run around like Gremlins and hide while peeking at you from behind the flower display. I know where they are though. Most of the time. There are times, and it only takes a split second for them to get away, and the motherly panic mode sets in. The monitoring radar system goes into overdrive complete with chest tightening and quick breathing. Three eyes, long neck and outward turned ears doing a full search for the target. B-e-e-p, b-e-e-p, be-ep, be-ep, beep, beep, beep. Target found. Target engaged. Mother pounces at record setting speeds and pulls the ankle biter from its hiding spot. Mother drags the creature by the bicep back to the rest of the clan. Success.

There is that fear that one of the Wee Ladies is going to disappear or be snatched by a stranger. I have put such fear in EvieG about strangers that I hope some of it has sunk into her wee head.That fear is what drives the monitoring radar system and it is even in overdrive when the Wee Ladies are outside in the backyard. There was one time when EvieG was about 14 months old and my monitoring radar system was in its infancy. I was on the phone and Hubby was working in the yard. I thought he had her. He thought I had her. But really neither one of us had her. The old lady who had pulled over in her car across the street had her. EvieG escaped from the backyard and was on her way to the park. Crossed the street by herself and was leisurely on her way to play. Panic mode set in and I was frantically looking around the house and then looked out the front window. Our front door was opened so fast that it nearly came off its hinges. I think I set a sprint record as I bolted across the lawn and street in my bare feet. It was kind of like when you were a kid and you could run down gravel roads with bare feet and not feel a thing. That was me. The poor lady was wondering where the heck the neglectful parent was and then was put at ease when she saw me. EvieG was alright. Everyone was alright. It was only a few moments but it seemed like forever. Since then my monitoring system has been completely intact with no short circuits to report.

Efficiency is key when out with the Wee Ladies. Keeping track of three means that I don't bring anything with me. I never bring a purse. Just my bank card in my pocket. I leave the diaper bag or any other bag in the van. Extra things means possible complications with the monitoring radar system. So I keep it simple. The only annoying thing is that I change coats or pants and don't always remember to transfer the bank card. I have been less efficient that way, especially when the groceries have been rung through and I have no way to pay. Then I pull the Wee Ladies back out to the van to get my VISA. True story. All because I want my monitoring radar system to be working at full capacity.

Keeping the brood together is a challenge and that is why I don't go out with all of them unless I have to. It is much easier to stay at home. My third eye gets tired and my long neck gets cramped and my ears become strained. Plus my bank card and VISA need a rest. When we pull into the driveway, the monitoring radar system gives a sigh of relief, turns onto its low setting (it never really turns off) and we all come into the house, lock the doors and have a snack. Another mission complete. With no losses.

All's I'm sayin's all.

PS Have a great weekend and thanks for reading. I will be back on Monday with more to tell.

Labels: DDM