It seems like we are going through a lot of toilet paper and facial tissues. I recycle the empty rolls and I feel like I am going to be the talk of the people at our local recycling depot pretty soon. "Hey, have you seen the number of toilet paper rolls that chick goes through every week?" "I know! Did you happen to notice how many cans of beans got dumped in the bin?" Guffaw. I refuse to buy the package of 24 single rolls. I would rather have the 12 double rolls. Because then I don't look like a total TP waster. And then I feel like I am being more efficient in going through less. The opposite is probably true. I would certainly change the TP even more often with the single rolls, but with the double rolls, we are probably going through more than we think because of the illusion of having more there.

We have lost whole roles in the toilet. The Destroyer thought it would be a good idea to see what a water-logged roll looked like. I can't afford to keep losing TP and tissues. Especially when Spark Plug and The Destroyer find a box of Kleenex and then drop them downstairs to the first floor one at a time like softly falling snow. I usually try to put the unused Kleenex back into the box. I can't say the same for the toilet paper.

The Wee Ladies don't know what the term 'moderation' means yet. When they have a cold and have to blow their horn, they end up taking fistfuls of tissues for one blow. And they still manage to cover their faces and shirts with goop. And when they go to the washroom, they pull and tug and pull on the roll of toilet paper until they could easily compete with the Bounty paper towels to absorb any spill. 

When they are potty training, they use the toilet paper even when they are not actually going to the bathroom. But they are actively practicing going through the entire washroom process. Complete with flush and a wave good-bye. We can't win. They know they have to use the stuff, and so they do.

We will have to introduce a new math game with them. We are going to have to play the Count-Out-the-TP-Tickets Game. We will have to teach them that they can only use a set number of TP tickets each time they use the bathroom. And what happens if they use more than the allotted number? Well, I don't know. I am just making this up as I write. Suggestions are welcome.

Plunging the toilet because it is clogged with too much TP is nothing to be proud of. The real reason for plunging? Well now, that is a different story!

All's I'm sayin's all.

PS Happy Easter! I hope everyone enjoys the holiday. We are guaranteed to go overboard in chocolate but I am cool with that. I will be back next Tuesday.