Along with smashing every sand castle she lays her eyes on, she has also become a scavenger. Much like a seagull, The Destroyer often finds herself scouring the beach for her next snack. And it is not from me and the wonderful array of healthy choices I have packed. No, her snack radar is turned on, she sees the pretzels on the blanket next to us, and off she goes. The party of four beside us look up only to find The Destroyer standing and staring over them, sand covering most of her body. I look and wait for one leg to go up while she patiently waits for a handout.

She will gesture towards the food of others. And grunt. Even though she is perfectly capable of communicating her wants, instead she will chirp like a seagull. As the mother of the family reaches toward the bag of pretzels, The Destroyer is instantly spooked but not distracted. She backs up a few steps, eyes still firmly laid on the snack. She does not deviate. The mother looks at me and asks with uncertainty and a hint of annoyance, "Can she have some pretzels?" I sharply reply with, "Oh, no thanks. We have snacks over here. She is fine without. Sorry about her hovering." 

I have to fly over and once in her peripheral, she runs off, much like a seagull. Both The Destroyer and Spark Plug spend lots of time chasing the pesty birds, so it is no wonder The Destroyer has picked up some bad habits from them as she carefully studies their tactical behaviour.

Without achieving her pretzel goal and as she is avoiding my grip, she heads for another family who have comfortably set themselves up at the picnic table. Here she tries to get in by heading under the bench of the table and up through the other side where the chips are. "Oh, hi there!" they greet. And then The Destroyer comes up for air and stares at the bag. "Would you like a chip?" Just as she is reaching to satisfy her salt and vinegar craving, I swoop in and capture her. "I am so sorry about her pesty, seagull-like behaviour. She knows what she wants, that's for sure. And just so you know, she gets fed regularly." But like a seagull, there is always more and there is always going to be something better.

When we were at the park one day, I made the grave mistake of not sealing our banana bread in a container. As I was watching the Wee Ladies play, I heard the squawking of seagulls in the background. And then like a bolt of lightening, I remembered- my banana bread! Crap! I turned around to find about 4 seagulls ripping apart our snack. I ran over to shoo them away and discovered that every single crumb had been devoured by these irritating creatures. 

WARNING: Food left unattended may miraculously disappear at the blink of an eye if The Destroyer is in its proximity. 

All's I'm sayin's all.

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All's I'm sayin's all.

There was so much goodness around her that she didn't know how or when to call it quits. She binged. Just like adults do at the all-you-can-eat-dessert-buffet. They say that it is common for people to gain an average of a pound a day on a cruise. With the change of environment, the access, the options, the temptation, I can see how it is difficult to STOP the massive, indulgent consumption. EvieG could not put a cork in it.

They went to a birthday party Friday night where there was an abundance of sweets and chips and BBQed goodies. EvieG was that kid in the candy store. Without her mother or father. And she went TO TOWN. Kool Aid Jammers, candy, cake, hot dogs, oh, and lots of Cheesies she told me. She got back to her cousin's, called in an enthusiastic state, and then went to bed. And then came the barf. Yep. I guess she got the entire household up at 3 am because she barfed all over.

Super.

It's like I never give her anything sugary and good. Uh huh. What, as soon as her mother is out of reach, she just goes hardcore? Three Kool Aids later, she thought that perhaps maybe she had had enough. She probably snuck a fourth all stealth like.

Is she going to be one of those compulsive people who can't make the madness stop? Is she showing signs of an addictive personality? Because she obviously can't figure out when to shut 'er down. I asked Hubby this question. He replied by explaining that she was enjoying her first cruise ship experience; that she was in a new place and was overwhelmed by temptation and independence. She just went crazy, like an adult would do at the buffet stations. After the 5 kinds of pasta, why would I settle for one choice when that chocolate mousse cake is sitting over at the other side of the table, beside the New York cheesecake, diagonal from the Turtle torte and down a bit from the Baileys Irish Cream cake? Oh, and I might as well sample the homemade ice cream and waffle cone on the way to the pool.

This was EvieG. A Cruiser.

She is totally aware that she over-indulged. She now knows what happens to her body when he puts too much crap into it. She did it to herself. Live and learn.

And then she eats two bites of her lunch and has the balls to ask for dessert. What will it take, I ask?

To drive it home, we told her what can happen if she were to continue making choices like she did. EvieG is petrified of needles. So we explained that a diet rich in sugar could lead to a disease called diabetes and the only way to stay healthy is to inject yourself with needles. Twice a day. Well, she didn't like the sound of that. It gave her the hee-bee-gee-bees. And then she asked where her crayons were. We decided to try it again later.

Or she will try it again later. Because with this kid, it might take a couple of tries for it to really sink in.

I just hope she doesn't end up in the hospital after her first night of drinking, only to have her stomach pumped because she didn't know when to quit. Ugh. Or maybe she will just gain a few pounds on her first real ocean cruise.

All's I'm sayin's all.

We are gone the rest of this week and I will be back online next week.

I apologize if I have disappointed any readers. Forgive me. I will be back next week.

All's I'm sayin's all.

Her birthday was on Friday. She woke up in the morning to a happy birthday sign beside her bed with string attached to it. She followed the string through the upstairs and ended up in our bedroom. At the end of the string were 5 clues. She read the clues and was sent on a wild search mission for her presents. There was one in the bathroom sink downstairs, one on the toy kitchen stove, one behind the closet door, and one under Hubby's boxer shorts. She embraced her role as detective.

The Wee Ladies and I went for an amazing hike through the forest. We stopped and had a snack on top of an enormous boulder while gazing into the freshly cut hay field. The views were spectacular.

EvieG had a great day. She got to pick out a gift using the birthday money from Uncle Paul and Aunt Nancy. We had giant, decadent chocolate cookies. We had a fun dinner and birthday cake. And yes. I made another DDM special. And I am not superstitious that I had a 6 shaped cake, with a number 6 candle, and 6 candles on it... This will not (better not) come back to haunt me.

On Saturday we had a great beach bash for her birthday party. We got together with some friends at the beach where the kids played and swam, Eve opened presents, and we had watermelon, cupcakes, and juice. They had a blast. And I didn't know until it was brought to my attention that apparently The Destroyer consumed about 6 juice boxes all to herself. No wonder she couldn't sit still when we went out for dinner afterwards. She was her own version of a super ball.

Now that the birthday is over, EvieG is big. Old. An adult. Tonight she ran upstairs to get me as I was folding laundry and demanded I come downstairs. I went with her only to find a lake on our living room and kitchen floors. She had cleaned the entire downstairs. She washed the dishes in the sink, washed off the table, and folded the blankets. She mopped the floor and then set the table for dinner. I said, "That's great! But we already had dinner!" She replied with, "Oh, right." I told her we could use the dishes for breakfast in the morning. She wasn't done there. She was about to work her way upstairs to clean the whole floor. I was informed that she is really happy to be big now that she is 6. And she is big enough to be just like Cinderella. And Annie. Like Annie told Daddy Warbucks, she is just trying to earn her keep. I gave her $3.00 for doing a bang up job and told her how proud I was that she did all that without me having to ask.

She is like my fairy godmother. She is growing up and all of a sudden making my job that much easier! Cleaning and washing and tidying? I mean how good is that? I hope that magic fairy dust doesn't get blown away too easily. And I hope the demons of the 666 cake don't come and carry my fairy godmother away.

I'll have puberty to thank for that. When she really thinks she's big and knows everything.

All's I'm sayin's all.

We're back! We had a good trip north and the Wee Ladies have grown several inches I think. Lots of playing, swimming, and mosquitoes. It is the year of the Blasted Prick. But we managed to carry on with the itching, scratching, and After Bite. We made it home and I admitted myself to the Emerg at our local hospital only to be diagnosed with a kidney infection/UTI. I am thrilled.

And then the pain set in. The burning, the pelvic pressure, and discomfort. The stitch in my flank. It wasn't too bad until the last few days there. I suspected what the doctor confirmed. We got home and then because Hubby was away for the night I waited another day to see a doctor. After heading over the the Emerg at our local hospital Saturday night, I peed into a cup, waited, and heard everyone's business. When it was my turn to see the doctor, she told me I had blood in my urine and that I had a kidney infection and UTI. I have never had one of these in my life. I am now on 10 days of antibiotics. Super.

Even though I felt it coming on, I was so busy with the Wee Ladies that I pushed it off to the side, figuring it wasn't a big deal. At least not a 10 day big deal. We moms are always shoving our needs aside. It's what we do. And I didn't say much to anyone as I don't like to complain too much.

I feel tired, exhausted. Sore in my kidney area on my back. I feel badly for not playing as hard as I should be with the Wee Ladies. EvieG told me she forgives me. Thank the skies above for that! A couple more days until the meds kick in  and then I hope to bounce back as good as new soon.

Apologies to all of you for not having any guest posts up while I was gone. Nenny with Twins has been funneling around in a life of busy as she takes the twins to their first little day camp. Ever. And it has been good for them, but not good for her as she has had to deal with cranky, unhelpful ferry employees. My heart goes out to her as people make her already crazy day that much more challenging. 

Do people really understand how challenging and tiring it is to take care of wee ones all day, everyday? Even if they have been through it themselves? Sometimes I am not so sure. At least we moms have each other.

All's I'm sayin's all.